Emma Hannigan
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February 2012

2/12/2012

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Hello all!

I know it's only half way through February but I had a sudden compulsion to write and say hi, so here I am.
I'm still on the dairy free diet (it must be nearly a month by now) but guess what? It's going really well. I'm very proud of myself and cannot believe that I've gone all this time without chocolate! I never thought I would be able to manage a week without chocolate let alone four!
The first while was awful - I was dreaming in mars bars (I don't even like them so that was a weird one) and I ended each day feeling as if I'd taken the next step towards over coming heroin. I visited the old fashioned sweet shop in Bray. These sweet shops are springing up in towns all over Ireland right now, and they're marvelous to say the least. They have jars of boiled sweets and every kind of chocolate you can imagine. 
But they also do plenty of stuff that has no diary. I am now an expert on nougat and Turkish delight. In fact I reckon if there were certificates available for appreciation of said items I'd have a framed one on the wall in my hall way. 
I've also embraced dried banana chips, dried pineapple and mango. I know... It sounds so bloody healthy and knitted yoghurt of me. But it's honestly not that bad. I use rice milk in cooking and nobody else in the house has noticed. 
So why am I keeping up this crazy behaviour? I feel better. I really do. I used to have a bowel that thought it was a skip - that's no longer the case. I know that's probably too much information but hey it's' the truth. I have more energy and I just feel more eh... well. I know I've stopped having chemotherapy and radiation so it's not surprising I'm feeling less terrible, but I honestly think it's the non-dairy thing too. I'm not for a moment suggesting anyone else should try it, but all I can say is that it seems to help me. It's all a personal thing and I must confess to feeling a certain amount of violence towards people who preach that we must eat certain things and avoid others. I would never do that and by the time I write on here next, I might even be 'so over' the non-dairy buzz... 
I have to confess to a moment of wistful sadness today though. I went to the supermarket to buy another car load of shopping and there was the Easter shelf. Ah it was very sad. I stood like a lost soul staring at the chocolate bunnies and chicks, the eggs and bars, little animals and other cutsie stuff made out of chocolate.
So I did what all computer literate people do when something of vital importance upsets their day - I Googled right there and then using my i-phone. I found out that I can eat some of the Green and Blacks chocolate (they do eggs for Easter too) and after eight mints!!! I never loved them hugely before, but suddenly those eighties style chocolates, suave in their individual black wrappers, are an option. According to those who know (the folk on line) they must be the ones produced in UK. So I bought some and I've eaten three. That's now enough for me - for today at least. Before I'd have eaten the whole box and moved on to some thing else afterwards. So my chocolate tolerance has dropped. Am I a little disappointed? Ever so slightly. But as I said I feel better being a dairy free gal. 
Our son went away skiing for a week to Italy with school. He's just turned twelve. God it was a long week. He had the best time of his life and loved the skiing but it was hard to be at home with no contact from him (silly mum). I'm certainly not ready to let him go yet. There's a huge part of me that is massively relieved that he was confident and able enough to head off and have fun. All I want for them is to be happy people. In my humble opinion once we're happy in life we can achieve a multitude. So I'm thrilled he was happy, but I'm so relieved to have him home. 
I went to the airport to welcome him home along with the other parents and there was fantastic clapping and cheering when they poured through the arrivals gate. I brought balloons in the school colours, all of which the boys inhaled and sang like Alvin and the Chipmonks in the lift to the car park. Nice. 
Happy Valentines day to you all - I'm not a fan but I know lots of folk are. I happen to think it's all a bit silly. But I'm a horrible old cynic so ignore me!
I hope your world is spinning in the right way and that you're all happy and healthy. Keep fighting the good fight and I'll catch you all again real soon!
Love 
Emma
p.s. I'm off to see the Muppet Movie this week! I'm more excited than the kids. LOVE M 
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